


Life Lessons

by unfortunate17



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: I'm sorry again, M/M, it's really fluffy, omfg this is my first time writing sex, sorry in advance, ziam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-16
Updated: 2013-06-16
Packaged: 2017-12-15 02:51:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,894
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/844477
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unfortunate17/pseuds/unfortunate17
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>SUMMARY: Zayn is twenty-five, extremely wealthy, and the CEO of the largest software company in the UK, but his boyfriend, Liam, is eighteen and a broke college student. When Zayn finds out that Liam is ridiculously shy in the bedroom, he decides it’s time for a little education. </p><p>Alternatively: The four times Zayn teaches Liam something about sex.</p><p>Companion to I Just Sort Of</p>
            </blockquote>





	Life Lessons

**Author's Note:**

> WARNING: this is pretty much ALL porn and it’s my first time writing any sort of smut so um….oops? Basically, sorry ahead of time if this is really really bad :(
> 
> For NOEL (xxcaribbean)

Zayn first begins to understand when he has Liam pressed into his bed with the lights turned all the way off (Zayn likes soft lighting, but Liam wants nothing other than pitch darkness - and Zayn’s a bit of a sucker when it comes to Liam even though he doesn’t really understand why Liam doesn’t like showing himself off to Zayn).

“Zayn,” Liam mutters and Zayn sucks harder at his collarbone. Liam’s skin is ridiculously easy to mark and there’s something very satisfying when he watches Liam hunt for the one sweater he has to cover the mark and can’t find it because Zayn’s stolen it for the day. “Zayn  _come on_ , get on with it, yeah.”

At that, Zayn pulls back, frowning. He shifts up to press a kiss to the underside of Liam’s jaw, “I want to suck you first. You want me to suck you, Li?”

But Liam’s gripping him tightly and Zayn can feel the skin of Liam’s cheeks heating under his lips, “No,” he sounds embarrassed, “no  _god_  - why would you even  _want_ to?”

Zayn makes a surprised sound, “Are you serious?”

But Liam’s blush is only getting stronger, “Come on, Zayn, want to make you feel good. Hurry up. Just - just -  _yeah_.”

But Zayn pulls back completely, reaching up to press a soft kiss to Liam’s mouth, “I rather enjoy watching you fall apart.”

Liam shakes his head mutely and then Zayn feels the wetness against his palms where they’re resting on Liam’s cheekbones.

“ _Liam.”_

He scrambles backwards and reaches for the duvet, pulling it over their waists and yanking Liam close into his chest, “Jaan?”

Liam struggles against his grip for a moment, “ ‘m fine.”

“No, you’re not, Liam.” There’s a long, drawn out pause, “What’s the matter?”

Liam shrugs against him.

“Li?”

At that, he turns over sharply, “Can we please not talk about this right now?”

Zayn falls back into himself, the curt tone singeing, “Ok,” he placates, “whatever you want, Li. We’ll talk tomorrow, yeah?”

Liam does nothing more than shrug noncommittally in response.

……………………………………

The next morning, Zayn catches Liam trying to slip out of his grip and he raises a sharp, questioning eyebrow as Liam stumbles his way through an incomprehensible answer.

“Liam,” Zayn says quietly after nearly five minutes without an answer, “come here.”

Liam’s mouth trembles and then he’s surging forward, tumbling under the covers and huddling into Zayn’s arms, “I’m sorry.”

“You have nothing to be sorry  _for_.”

Liam buries his face in Zayn’s chest, “I don’t know what I’m doing. I don’t know _how._ And you do - and it it’s a little embarrassing.”

Zayn lets out a rush of air, “I like everything about you, Liam, and I’m going to like whatever we do. And we can always do whatever you like.”

Liam sighs, “I just. Sometimes I feel like I don’t give as good as I get, you know?”

Zayn stiffens suddenly, “ _What?”_ And there’s something cold pooling in his chest because there’s that tingling of doubt again, “What exactly are you getting at?”

Liam mumbles something that gets lost in Zayn’s sleep shirt.

“Liam.”  
Liam lifts his head, eyes boring into Zayn’s, “I don’t know how to - even.  _This._ Why are you with me?”

Zayn hides his face in Liam’s hair, “Because I’m sort of in love with you.”

Liam makes a frustrated sound, “But for how long?” he argues, “Because you’re gonna realize that I can’t really do anything in this department. Actually, scratch that, I don’t do anything for you in general. I just feel like - like you do a lot more for me than I do for you.”

Zayn shakes his head, smile pulling the corners of his mouth, “You don’t have to do anything for me.”

“But I want to, you see.” He pauses for a minute, leaning back to look at Zayn with those huge eyes, “Teach me?”

And Zayn presses chaste kisses to the top of Liam’s head, mouth pulling into a soft smile even though the thoughts in his head are far from innocent, “That’s not going to be much of a problem.”

He feels more than sees Liam blush again, “Ok.” He pauses, hesitant, “Promise you won’t laugh, though. I’m going to be shit.”

Zayn feels a laugh rumble through him, “I don’t know what you’ve been thinking, but you’re far from shit at anything you do. And the last thing I’m going to do is laugh while you suck me off.”

“ _Zayn!”_

**I.**

Zayn gives it three days before he’s slipping into the shower, pressing himself along Liam’s slick back and sucking another bruise into the back of his neck.

Liam jumps at first, hand slipping on the shower-wall, “Zayn,” he gasps.

Zayn hums in response, hands sliding around to press distractingly into Liam’s chest, “You look bloody gorgeous like this.”

Liam chuckles, ’ ‘m covered in soap.”

“Gorgeous,” Zayn mumbles again into his skin and his hand reaches forward to wrap around Liam’s cock, fisting slowly as Liam gasps in the heated shower, steam billowing around them.

“I can,  _fuck_ ,” Liam throws his head back onto Zayn’s shoulder, “I can do that myself.”

Zayn digs his teeth into Liam’s ear, tongue peeking out to trace the shell, “Where’s the fun in that?” He stops his motion and Liam whines needily.

“Zayn.”

Zayn bites down again and Liam’s back arches, “Zayn, come on.”

Zayn obliges, pumping twice before he’s stops and waits again, listening to Liam’s shaky breathing, “What?”

Liam makes a frustrated noise, “Hate you.”

“Why don’t you help me, baby?”

And then Liam’s blushing again and this time, Zayn can see it clearly, stretching down Liam’s cheeks, neck, shoulders, and even the tips of his ears, “I um,” he struggles to concentrate, “dunno.”

Zayn tangles his free hand with one of Liam’s that was previously hanging limply by his side. He drags it to join his own and their fingers wrap together over Liam and Zayn feels himself throb at the sight of their overlapping hands, dark and light and pretty under the showerhead.

He tightens his hand, bringing Liam’s with him and twists on the upstroke and Liam’s turning his head to look at him with reverent, reverent eyes, like Zayn is all he can see and hear and breathe and really, Zayn wouldn’t have it any other way.

“Zayn,” Liam mumbles, “you’re still -“

” ‘m fine,” Zayn mutters, dropping another kiss onto the tips of his cheekbones, “watch my hand.” Liam whimpers and his grip tightens, teeth digging into his bottom lip. Zayn grins, “Like this,” he twists his hands and Liam arches again, an embarrassing sound ripping from his throat, “Just like this.”

“ _Zayn - fuck.”_

Zayn hums quietly, “See, nothing to be embarrassed about, you’re brilliant.”

Liam tries to laugh but it comes out more than a little breathless and choked, “But I‘m not doing anything.”

And then, Zayn shifts his arm to wrap around Liam’s torso and spins him around, back hitting the shower wall. Liam makes a surprised little sound, but Zayn swallows it down with his mouth, hands reaching down to wrap around the both of them.

This time, Zayn doesn’t have to ask, because Liam’s hands shake when they join him and it’s all over way too fast, Zayn’s mouth sliding wetly over Liam’s jaw and Liam’s head tipped back against the wall, muttering, “Thank you. Thank you. _Thank you_.”

**II.**

Honestly, Zayn would rather stay inside and roll around in bed (or other places) with Liam, but there’s something ridiculous called  _work._ And missing too much of it is frowned upon, especially when you happen to be the CEO. Whatever, Zayn doesn’t really understand it, but he knows what it means: less Liam. And he’s not exactly happy about it because Liam’s gone enough already (bloody classes - what was the point of uni anyway).

Today, he’s crankier than ever, because he hasn’t touched Liam properly since that day in the shower nearly a week ago and he’d forgotten his lunch. Childishly (see naturally), Zayn had cooped up in his office all day and refused to open the door for his secretary (who spent more time bending over so that Zayn could see her cleavage then actually working). It’s no surprise that Liam hates her.

Liam.

Zayn groans loudly and pushes his hair back with his hands because it’s never been like this before. He’s never felt so fucking  _incomplete_ without a person before. So he skips functions, meetings, and business parties to stay home and eat pizza in Liam’s shitty student flat.

There’s a knock at his door and Zayn nearly flings a pen at it.

“I’m busy,” he shouts back, but the knock continues. “I  _said -”_

“Zayn?”

Zayn freezes and then nearly trips over his feet to yank the door open and Liam’s on the other side, bathed in soft lighting, smile pulling his cherry lips and a container of Indian takeaway in his hands. “Hi?” Liam looks puzzled, “everything ok?”

Zayn lets out a rush of hair and wraps Liam in a tight hug, ignoring the whispers that break out in the hall, “Yeah, come in. God. They’re driving me insane.” Liam smells like chocolate and home and Zayn feels all the tension just dissipate from his body.

Liam chuckles, then pushes the door shut, dropping the container on Zayn’s desk before turning to smiles back at him with his teeth. He’s in nothing but his usual track bottoms and a plain, white T-shirt but Zayn thinks he looks ten times better than anyone in the building, including himself (not that he’d ever admit that aloud).

Zayn sits heavily in his chair and Liam sinks down in front of him, dropping a kiss to his hand, “You’re so mean to your workers.”

Zayn shrugs, running a hand through Liam’s soft hair, “Well they’re not you, are they?”

“Not everyone can be me, Zayn.”

“I can always wish, can’t it,” Zayn smirks, “Besides, if you were everyone than I could have two - or maybe even  _three_  - of you when -”

“ _Zayn._ ”

Zayn pouts, “Sorry.” He leans over to hug Liam again, breathing him in, “But you’d always be the best Liam.”

Liam chuckles lightly, “Glad to know that. Now you wanna eat or what?”

Zayn shrugs, “Whatever you want.”

“Really?” And now Liam looks a little hesitant, “Because - um - there’s something I’ve been meaning to try.”

Zayn raises an eyebrow, “Anything you want, you know that already.”

Liam’s hands slide up his thighs and he’s slowly undoing the button and zipper, hands still shaking.

Zayn stops him, “Liam, you don’t have to do that.”

Liam struggles against his hands and succeeds in undoing pants completely, “Want to really badly.”

Zayn lets out a rush of air, laughter bubbling up into his throat, “Then who am I stop you?”

Liam laughs loudly and then proceeds to help Zayn out of his clothes off. Though there’s a glint in his eyes when he leaves the white business shirt and striped tie on. Zayn tries not to be embarrassed by the way his cock tents his boxers but Liam’s got these pretty lips that he keeps biting from nerves and Zayn wants to reach out and kiss him, but Liam’s arm holds him down.

Liam kisses him once on the mouth, before trailing his lips down Zayn’s throat and sucking lightly on his collarbone.

“Liam,” Zayn mutters, “my lunch break is only forty minutes.”

Liam snorts into his collarbone, “You think I can’t get you off in forty minutes?”

“Not what I meant.”

Liam leans back and smiles cheekily, “Cause I can - more than once if you want.”

He’s got messy hair and a pretty mouth and Zayn feels his heart swell four sizes too big for his chest, “Love you,” he tells him, “don’t think I’ve told you today.”

Liam pouts, “It means nothing when I’m about to suck your dick.”

Zayn goes to make another ridiculous comment but his nerves are buzzing in anticipation because sweet, shy, lovely Liam is about to get on his knees for him in the middle of his lunch break in his office building.

Liam pulls Zayn’s trousers down and his eyes flicker up to meet his, “You’re incredible,” he says, voice awed.

Zayn shudders in response, whimpering when he watches himself disappear in Liam’s slick mouth. Liam begins slowly, plagued by boyish innocence and inexperience, eyes flicking to find Zayn’s approval every few seconds.

Zayn would find it absolutely adorable if Liam wasn’t so fucking hot like this. Truth be told, all Zayn can really do is try and remain somewhat still and fight against the overwhelming need to push up into Liam’s mouth and hands. The muscles in his chest coil and Zayn thinks they must be doing so to the beat of his heart because that’s the only thing he’s able to make out over the rushing in his ears.

“Liam,” Zayn mutters, as if Liam has a chance to reply, “right under there, yeah,” he tells him, hands guiding his head softly.

Liam’s eyes flicker back up to him like they’ve done over and over again in twenty-second intervals. Zayn thinks that it’s probably a combination of this and the sudden way Liam pushes his tongue up to the underside of Zayn’s cock, teeth grazing the base lightly, that has Zayn dangerously close to tipping over.

“Liam. Fuck.  _Off.”_

He only has time to push his hands into Liam’s hair and tug before Liam’s pulling off, hands reaching up to cup him as Zayn comes in hot spurts into Liam’s hands and a little on his shirt as he works him through it slowly.

Zayn tips forward to press a kiss to the top his head and Liam leans back on his haunches, mouth curved into a smile. Zayn can’t help but reach out and thumb at his full bottom lip and Liam’s blushing again, bright and red and beautiful.

“Was that ok?” he asks quietly and Zayn feels something wonderful spin through him, almost better than him nearly coming down Liam’s throat.

“Perfect,” Zayn whispers, “you’re actually perfect and I don’t know how to deal with that.”

Liam sighs and rests his head on Zayn’s knee, drawing aimless patterns on his expensive suit bottoms. “I’m in so much trouble,” he muses quietly.

Zayn’s mouth pulls up mischievously, “Yeah, the bathroom’s all the way down the hall.”

**III.**

The thing about Liam is that he has this  _face._ These huge, brown, brown eyes and heavy set eyebrows and this pout that makes Zayn wants to hide him from the rest of the world and all the tabloids that ask Zayn what he’s doing with a first year uni student.

That is, until Liam does something as innocent as pulling his shirt off when it’s too hot or dragging Zayn away from the paps. It’s then that Zayn can’t take his eyes off of the way his back sort of  _ripples_ and the fact that, wow, Liam is actually _really fit_ \- and a lot fitter than he is.

Zayn leans back into the couch, Liam draped over him as he rubs at his eyes, yawning, as his shirt twists up and under his body. A part of Zayn wants to coo at him, while the other part wants to be held up against the wall.

Not that Liam’s ever done that before. He claims he doesn’t know  _how_ and Zayn’s always been more than ok with making Liam fall apart with his fingers and dick but he can’t help but  _imagine_ what it would be like. To have Liam stretch him open, Zayn’s legs around his waist, and hands fisted in his hair.

Liam snuffles, huddling closer into Zayn’s warmth, “ ‘m sleepy.”

Zayn laughs softly, dragging a hand through his hair, watching as Liam’s nose crinkles at the sensation, “Got an idea.”

Liam groans, “Not again.”

“Hey,” Zayn slaps his bum and Liam shakes with silent laughter, “carry me to bed.”

Liam looks up at him, assessing, and promptly slides off, holding out his arms as Zayn clambers in, wrapping his legs around his waist and his arms around Liam’s neck. Liam grunts under his weight and they’re nearly thrown off balance for a second, Zayn laughing wildly at the way Liam’s head smacks against the door jam.

“ _Baby_ ,” Zayn chuckles into the skin of his neck, “ _careful_.”

Liam grumbles and playfully smacks his ass, “It’s all  _your_  fault.”

Zayn digs his foot into Liam’s back for good measure and fists a hand in the longer portion of Liam’s hair, “Saying I’m fat, Payne?”

Liam snorts, “Between us, I’m the fat one.”

“Baby,” Zayn says, again, tone falsely wounded, “your body is a  _wonderland.”_

“That’s it. I’m dropping you.”

Liam shoulders open the door to their bedroom before Zayn’s kicking it shut childishly, frowning heavily, “Liam. Wait. Wait. Wait.”

Liam pauses, leaning back against the wall closest to the door to take some of the literal weight off of his shoulders, “What? Come up with any more bright ideas?”

Zayn smiles, white teeth flashing in the dim room, lit only by the open window, “You don’t like this one?” Liam glares harshly in return but Zayn can see the playful smile pulling at the corners of his lips. He shoves at Liam’s chest until they’re positions are reversed, leveling him with a filthy look, “Why don’t you fuck me?”

It probably wasn’t what Liam had in mind because his eyes get all big and round and his nose wrinkles, “What?”

_“Fuck me.”_

“Zayn,” he hesitates, “I don’t - um. Not sure how to do that, actually.”

Zayn shrugs, “Everything’s new til you do it once isn’t it?”

“Yeah,” he struggles for words, “I mean,” his voice gets all quiet and Zayn has to strain to hear him correctly even from where he’s wrapped around him, “I’ll be shit at it.” His eyes are fixed on the floor, hands warm on Zayn’s back and waist and Zayn reaches up to grab his cheeks.

“I’ll walk you through it,” Zayn tells him, smiling widely. Liam mimics it poorly but there’s still worry pressed into his eyes. “Relax,” Zayn tells him.

Liam lets out a rush of air, “So we’re really doing this?”

“Yeah, yeah we are.” Zayn says, “And you’ll be fine.”

And Liam gets that adorable crinkle between his eyes that makes Zayn want to cuddle him, but at the same time, Liam’s arms are flexed around him and yeah ok, that’s actually really hot. “Right,” Liam tells him. He pauses then looks around before turning back to meet Zayn’s eyes, “Um. What do I do first?”

And he can’t help it, really,  _honestly_  - so he bursts into laughter while Liam pouts at him.

“ _Zayn_.”

“Sorry,” he chuckles, “right. So you have to open me up first. Do  _not_  forget to do that.”

Liam’s face is bright red, but he brings Zayn to the bed and sets him down gently before he pulls the lube from the dresser drawer. He stares at the little container for a long time, eyes flicking up to Zayn and he looks helpless.

Zayn takes the bottle gently from his fingers and pops the lid, bringing up Liam’s hand, pressing a kiss to the knuckles and then dips two fingers in.

Liam hisses, jerking his fingers out of the container, “That’s cold.”

Zayn raises a smooth eyebrow, “That’s about to be in my ass. Quit complaining.”

“Right. Sorry.”

Liam raises his fingers, “Um. Should I just - you know.”

Zayn pulls down his trousers and then tugs up his shirt. “Yeah, get right to it.”

Liam watches him undress quietly, but Zayn can see the way his adam’s apple bobs when he swallows and the way his pupils dilate. He smirks, “I’ll get you out of your clothes when you’re done.”

Liam nods once but his eyes are trained on Zayn, brows furrowed as he probably debates on how best to do this. Zayn pulls him up on the bed, impatiently, and leans back, resting on the pillow as Liam hovers over him, one leg on either side of his body.

“Right,” Liam says again and his voice sounds wrecked, “I’m going to do it now.” He leans over and kisses Zayn softly, pulling back with worried eyes, “Tell me if it hurts please.”

Zayn rolls his eyes and shoves him playfully, “Yeah, yeah. Now hurry up.”

And the first thing Zayn notices is that yes it makes a difference that Liam’s hands are bigger and wider than his. The first press in has him screwing his eyes shut, a sound of pain falling from his mouth as he tries to think back to the months - years maybe - it’s been since he’s had sex this way.

“Zayn?” Liam’s voice is small and breathless, “are you alright?”

Zayn nods imperceptibly, gritting his teeth, “Yeah, yeah keep going.”

But Liam looks panicked and he’s staring down at his hand in terror, “Just like - push in further? But you’re - I don’t want to hurt you.”

Zayn closes his eyes, the sharp burn already fading to a dull throb in the background. Liam shifts up when he doesn’t get a response but then his finger is dragging against a spot inside Zayn that makes him catch fire.

“Liam fuck, if you pull out I  _will_  kill you.” Zayn forces out (but it’s a lie really) and Liam’s sitting back in place, “Come on. Fuck. Right there, yeah.”

And then there’s a smile spreading across Liam’s face and he twists his finger up just like before, “Like that?”

“ _Fuck you.”_

Liam smirks and it’s as if someone’s flipped a switch of confidence, “Fuck me,” he corrects.

Zayn nods reverently, “That too.” He tugs weakly at Liam’s shirt, “ _Off_.”

Liam pulls his finger out and Zayn levels him with a glare for a split second but then Liam’s clothes are disappearing and there’s all this beautiful, beautiful pale skin stretching over hard muscle. And Zayn couldn’t spell his own name if you asked him to.

“Come here,” Zayn mutters and Liam leans over him, cocky smile still in place until Zayn’s covering it with his own mouth, arms going around his neck as Liam’s weight pushes him further into the bed. And luckily too, because Zayn nearly throws him off, arching up as Liam slips two surprising fingers back into him.

“Shit, ok,” he laughs, “We totally should have done this ages ago.”

Liam rests his head on Zayn’s collarbone, nipping the skin softly, “I like everything we do.”

Zayn snorts but it’s cut off with a gasp when Liam adds another finger, working him open slowly, carefully, arms safe and warm around him and this is pretty much all Zayn’s ever wanted - in this life and the next.

“Ok,” he mutters, “Li I’m good, babe. I’m good.”

Liam’s brow furrows, “Really?”

“ _Jaan,”_ the endearment just sort of slips out, sliding around his tongue, gripping his heart. Liam smiles down at him and leans forward to press a kiss to the top of Zayn’s belly, rearranging himself between Zayn’s legs. He uses one hand to push back Zayn’s knee and the other to guide himself in carefully.

“Ok?” Liam’s voice is nearly a whisper.

Zayn alternates between gripping his shoulders and taking deep breaths as Liam stretches him tight, body warm over his.

“God,” Zayn tells him, awed. His pulse is hammering in his chest, pulsing at the edges of his forehead, and Liam looks stunning in the dim light. He thinks there must be something special about this, not just sex, but sex between him and Liam because he doesn’t think intimacy like this exists between everyone.

“You feel so good,” Liam mutters against his collarbone, “I didn’t think - are you? Good, I mean?”

Zayn laughs breathlessly, “I’m perfect. But can you, like -” he twists his hips up, changing the angle and this time when Liam goes back him, Zayn feels the edges of his vision go white and hazy with pleasure, “Like that -  _fuck.”_

“Right,” Liam says, gripping his hips, thumb marking red onto Zayn’s black heart, “Right - I can do that.” There’s a crinkle between his brows again and Zayn would reach out a kiss it but Liam’s sort of hitting  _that_ spot every other time and it’s a little sloppy and Liam’s rhythm is kind of off because he pulls out too slowly and pushes in too fast but Zayn fucking loves it. Loves that he can’t tell where Liam ends and he begins.

Zayn’s about to say something - something for the life of him he can’t remember when one of Liam’s hands slips down his body, seeking out Zayn’s cock, folding around it. And Zayn loses all rhythm immediately, struggling to breathe as Liam leans down to lick into his mouth.

“Oh,” Liam mumbles, enlightened, hand still around him, firm and fast, “so  _that’s_ what I’m supposed to do.”

Zayn makes an embarrassing sound, the world whiting out into hazy patterns behind his eyes, ears ringing loudly, and white hitting his and Liam’s chest.

Liam keeps a hold of him and bucks up once, twice, thrice, a fourth time before he’s following right after with a harsh groan in Zayn’s shoulder.

There’s a long pause.

Zayn can hear the crickets from the open window before Liam sighs happily into his shoulder.

Zayn squirms, “Fingers outta my side, Li.”

“Ticklish?” Liam’s mouth is curved into a wicked smile, but he’s still breathing hard and Zayn would feel disgusting but he also sort of doesn’t want to move.

“No,” he says flatly just as Liam’s fingers press deeper into his side. He huffs a laugh, smiling, “ _no_.”

“Whatever you say, Zayn,” Liam groans, falling back onto Zayn’s shoulder, “ ‘m _really_  sleepy now.”

Zayn shoves him, slapping his bum, “Get off me.”

Liam’s eyes are huge and brown when they peek up at him, “I’m not that heavy.”

“No,” Zayn replies, “you’re  _fat._ ”

“Yeah,” Liam tells him, rolling to his right, “it’s over. Goodbye Zayn.”

Zayn rolls his eyes and turns over, pressing his face into the pillow to hide his smile, “Get out of my bed then.”

Zayn hears Liam shuffle to the bathroom and the room is bathed in yellowed light for a moment before the bed dips softly and there’s a warm washcloth running on his chest and stomach, cleaning him up, before Liam’s gone again, flicking the bathroom light off and then crawling back into bed.

“So,” he clears his throat and Zayn can feel his warm breath on the back of his neck, “take me back, please?”

Zayn laughs outright and turns back around, digging himself back into Liam’s grip. “Go to sleep.”

Liam hums softly into his hair, “Am I forgiven though?”

“ _Jaan.”_

“I’m thinking  _yes_.”

**IV.**

The thing is, this little…experiment of theirs (or education as Zayn likes to call it - especially in response to Liam’s horror), has changed them in interesting ways. It’s not that Zayn didn’t love their dynamic before, or that he didn’t love that Liam blushed every time he said the word “cock” (and Liam still does), but there’s something in Liam’s stance now - in the way he walks and talks to the paps and the businessmen that Zayn works with who love to put Liam down as immature and childish. It’s confidence. Liam feels  _good_ about himself and he smiles wider, laughs harder, and Zayn loves him more than before (or at least he thinks he does because there’s a part of his brain that tells him that it isn’t possible to love Liam  _more)_.

Confidence works in strange ways though, as Zayn has come to know. Confidence doesn’t necessarily mean Liam will march up to the paps that take invasive photographs and tell them to fuck off, but it does mean that he’s become more  _mischievous_ (Zayn can’t really think of a better word). But yeah, Liam’s sucked him off in his office building and then sheepishly jogged to the bathroom to clean up while Zayn’s employees snuck looks at the two of them, slack jawed.

In fact, it’s especially apparent when one night they’re in their favorite park - and it’s not even a nice one with all its over rusted swings and dead grass but it’s Zayn’s favorite and the paps never seem to look there. So more often than not, a night out usually meant grabbing something from the local Tescos and hiding behind the clearing of trees as Liam told him about something ridiculous that happened at uni.

Tonight, Zayn’s up there alone, Liam promising to join him right after his shift at the library because Liam is responsible like that. He also wants desperately to have money to pay his student flat rent though Zayn’s told him multiple times he’d do it for him. Liam is also extremely stubborn.

“Hey,” Liam huffs, brushing off his track pants, as he walks towards where Zayn is leaning back against a tree, “sorry I’m late.”

Zayn shrugs and pats the grass beside him, “Sit.”

Liam sits down gently, pulling Zayn in close. Zayn goes pliant under his arms, resting his head on Liam’s collarbone. “Where’s my food?”

Liam’s hands freeze in his hair, “Um. At the store?”

“ _Liam.”_

Liam sputters, “I’m sorry but I was late and well - “ He trails off helplessly, hands waving.

Zayn smiles into his skin. “Make it up to me,” he demands.

“How?”

Zayn raises his head to look at him mischievously before standing abruptly, tugging at Liam’s arm, “Come on.”

Liam raises an eyebrow, complying, “Where are we going?” He shuffles forward, nearly tripping and Zayn can sense that it’s been a long, hard day for the both of them.

He points with his free hand towards the darker shrubbery, “Just up there yeah?”

Liam eyes him and the location warily, “Not going to kill and dump my body are you?”

“You’re too pretty to kill,” Zayn smirks at him, “And I think I’d miss you.”

Liam eyes are soft when he leans over to kiss Zayn’s cheek, thumbing over his jaw and Zayn yanks him faster into the trees. When they do reach the canopy, it’s dark and quiet and the night seems to mask everything. Zayn can barely make out Liam standing close behind him, his hands around Zayn’s waist.

“What are we doing?”

Zayn tips his head back onto Liam’s  shoulder and sighs, “I really want to kiss you.”

Liam’s mouth quirks up, “So you brought me here?”

Zayn hums in agreement, “Also want to fuck you.”

“We’re in a  _park._ ” Liam’s eyes are wide and unnerved and Zayn wants to laugh at him. But that would be rude and uncouth so he doesn’t.

Zayn nods again, guiding Liam backwards, and despite the hesitation in his eyes, he goes easily, “Is this for the sandwiches?” Liam asks, wincing as the bark digs into his back, “Because I can run back and get them if you want.”

Zayn rolls his eyes, “I’m actually really glad you forgot them, babe.”

Liam looks panicked, “Someone’s going to see and then your naked bum is going to be all over the paper.”

Zayn hides his face in Liam’s neck, choking back laughter, “The public can thank me later.”

Liam tries to hold it in, but the laugh bursts out anyway, though there is an exaggerated pout still on his face, “I’m the only that should get to see your naked bum, Zayn.”

“You’re such a kid,” Zayn mutters because he’s still at a loss for words with Liam sometimes, “Dunno why I fell for you.”

Liam side eyes him but his cheeks are still pink so the effect is completely lost, “You’re telling me. I’ll probably regret it first since you’ll be old and wrinkly before me.”

Zayn narrows his eyes, pressing harder against Liam’s frame and propelling the both of them into the tree, rough branch scraping Liam through his shirt, “Me? I’ll be gorgeous even when I’m sixty-nine.” And his mouth curves up at the ends as Liam flushes further.

“You’re awful,” Liam mumbles sorely, “Really, really awful. But it’s ok, I’m sure someone will be ok with an out of form, old man.”

Zayn’s hands drop to the seam of Liam’s pants and he squirms further, trying to find a way out of his cage without letting everyone figure out what exactly was happening, “Twenty quid you’ll still be here when I’m sixty-nine.”

Liam snorts, “You’re ridiculous.”

Zayn waggles his eyebrows, “Don’t take me lightly, Li, you’ll learn that I’m exceptionally good at winning seemingly difficult bets. But this one here - you’re setting yourself up for failure.”

“Doesn’t matter,” Liam says stoutly, “I’d never settle for someone who’s out of form.”

“Liam,” Zayn tells him, smiling wickedly with all his teeth, undoing Liam’s zipper, “do you want to test my form?”

“No.” (Zayn’s hands can tell Liam feels otherwise.)

“Well we’re testing it.”

Liam lets out a rush of air and peeks over Zayn’s shoulders twice on either side, “We’re still in a park.” But his hands are already running over Zayn’s chest and he’s biting his bottom lip in  _that_ way and Zayn’s not going to be able to construct full sentences for much longer.

He leans forward to nose at Liam’s neck, feeling him swallow, “Still can’t bring myself to care.”

Liam holds his breath for a minute, “Ok,” he’s mumbling fast and Zayn would shout that he’d managed to  _corrupt Liam Payne_ at the top of his lungs if his mouth wasn’t occupied with trying to make a coin sized mark on Liam’s birthmark. “Ok,” Liam says again, “but hurry up,”

Zayn laughs lightly, pushing up to kiss Liam’s cheeks, “Afraid of getting caught, babe?”

“ _Yes.”_

Zayn smiles into his skin, “We’ll give ‘em a good show, don’t worry.”

“Zayn,” Liam mutters furiously and Zayn can  _taste_ the embarrassment on his tongue, “Get on with it.  _Now._ ”

Zayn pulls back then, frowning, “Can’t I suck you off first?”

Liam’s breath catches in his throat and Zayn can tell that he’s seriously considering this and it makes him oddly satisfied to know this. In the end, Liam frowns again, “No.”

“No?” Zayn shoves back his hair and peers at him, assessing, “Haven’t I taught you anything, Li?”

But Liam’s smiling, shaking his head, “No. I - not here though, ok.   _Later_.”

“But you’ll let me fuck you.”

Liam shrugs casually, “Can’t have everything my way, can I?” He leans in close and his eyes are twinkling - but far from the childish way that Zayn’s used to seeing, “Besides, I sort of want you to.”

“ _Christ_ ,” Zayn groans, “you’re really fucking hot you know that? Like really fucking  _fit_.”

Liam blushes and buries his face in Zayn’s neck, “You’re not bad yourself.”

And Zayn is going to cry from how turned on he is, how fucking loved Liam makes him feel, “Fuck you.” He tells him, reverent, “I really, really fucking loathe you.”

Liam snuffles adorably, “You say that all the time,” he pops open the top buttons of Zayn’s dress shirt, “but you don’t really mean it do you?”

Zayn whines, but doesn’t have the capacity to properly respond because he’s flicking through Liam’s wallet, fingers moving past the condom to the little packet of lube he’d hid inside as Liam stammered out excuse after excuse as to why he didn’t actually need it.

He pulls the packet open with his teeth (Liam laughs at him loudly but Zayn’s shushing him with a sound look and a pull at his pants and underwear), slicking three fingers and sparing one last glance around the area before he slips a finger in Liam slowly and carefully because no matter what, Zayn always tends to treat Liam like glass.

Liam makes a sound into his neck and Zayn’s trying to remember how to breathe, “Jaan, you’ve got to be quiet, ok?  _Quiet_  love.”

Liam nods silently and apart from a hitch in his throat when Zayn adds the other two fingers, he stays true to his word and does nothing other than try and mark Zayn’s right shoulder with this lips.

“One day,” Zayn tells him conversationally as if he’s not currently finger-fucking Liam in a park (though there really isn’t anybody else around), “I’m going to ink your lips into my skin, yeah.” He drops his head onto Liam’s shoulder, “Right over my chest - right next to my fucking heart and just.  _Fuck._ ”

Liam makes a soft sound and runs a hand over Zayn’s back, “You’re good to go,” he tells him hoarsely, “Go ahead.”

Zayn raises his head and he knows there are embarrassing tears in his eyes but Liam’s eyes are huge and pretty and beautiful in the dying light, halo blazed around his head from the sunset (though that was nearly an hour ago), “Good?”

Liam nods quietly, “Yeah.” He looks around sharply then, “Hurry up.”

Zayn hums, guiding himself in completely, stilling to keep from all this being over in about twenty seconds. Liam lets out these eager little gasps and Zayn’s heart bangs into his chest in an effort to offer even more of itself to Liam.

Zayn’s a little more experienced at this than Liam is and he’s able to get into it faster, rhythm falling into place quickly. Zayn also knows Liam’s body better than he knows his own, knows that Liam likes it when Zayn nudges his prostate every other time, knows that Liam likes it when Zayn scrapes his teeth along his earlobes, knows that Liam likes everything about Zayn (even though Zayn can’t fathom why).

And it’s good - it’s so fucking good, but Liam’s eyes aren’t screwed shut - instead his cheeks are redder than usual, flushed with an extra bright blush of embarrassment because he’s sure that this might be against the law. Though Zayn can tell he’s a little thrilled that Zayn - immaculate, wise Zayn is doing something this, well, stupid. (Because it is sort of stupid).

“Zayn,” Liam says then, and Zayn has to shush him again, “ _Please._ ” His fingers are twisting in and out of Zayn’s shirt and Zayn nods hastily in understanding.  

“Hold on, Li,” he says, reaching down to wrap his fingers around Liam’s cock, jerking him quickly, thrusts deepening until Liam’s wincing every time his t-shirt clad back brushes against the bark and Zayn pauses, alarmed.

Liam makes a breathless noise at the fear coloring Zayn’s face, “No. No don’t stop. Just.” He fumbles, “The tree sort of hurts.  _Zayn - don’t stop.”_

“Ok,” Zayn looks around for a minute, nodding to himself “Ok.” He flips them around quickly so he’s the one up against the tree, sliding down until he’s sitting, Liam in his lap.

Liam makes a soft noise against his throat, “You’re too good to me.”

Zayn laughs, fucking up into Liam, vision whiting with pleasure as Liam kisses him quickly, “I love you.”

Liam nods, nipping his jaw, “Still too good to me.”

“Too bad,” Zayn mutters, “you’re stuck with me.”

“Ok,” Liam mumbles back easily and he’s restless, pushing down hard against Zayn, “Gonna come.”

Zayn licks into his mouth, “Wait for me.”

“ _Can’t.”_

Zayn screws his eyes shut, fucking up harder and quicker, “Just a minute.” He can tell Liam is shaking in an effort to hold still and Zayn reaches forward to jerk him off again and that’s pretty much the end. Liam comes silently, mouth still pressed to Zayn’s and Zayn’s sort of trembling badly, tears in his eyes, gripping Liam’s waist for long moments after, trying to steady his breathing.

“Ok?” Liam asks finally, shifting off him to fall back into the grass.

Zayn hums, crawling over to lay beside him, curling an arm around Liam’s shoulder as Liam tries to make the two of them look remotely decent. But, it’s dark enough that Zayn doesn’t really care, the cool breeze ruffling their hair and soothing against their heated skin.

“You have sex hair,” Liam tells him, smiles lighting his face.

Zayn nuzzles him, “Whatever. ‘s your fault anyway.”

He feels more than sees Liam shrug, “What can I say? It’s soft.”

There’s a long moment of silence and Zayn traces where the moon would be in the sky if the night was right.

“Jaan,” Liam tells him, tracing patterns over Zayn’s mussed shirt, buttoned courtesy of Liam. His eyes flicker up to meet Zayn’s, “You call me that a lot.”

Zayn shrugs, “Suits you.”

“What’s it mean?”

Zayn debates for a minute, then sighs, rubbing a thumb over Liam’s jawline, “Life.”

And then, Liam has that look in his eyes that he gets when he’s focused and concentrated, eyebrows knitting as the skin between them wrinkles, “What?”

“Life,” Zayn repeats, “it’s like - like you’re my life, yeah?”

“Really?” There’s something vulnerable in Liam’s eyes that squeezes the last of Zayn’s heart.

Zayn kisses him chastely, refusing to reply.

Liam nods then, biting his lip, “It suits you too.”

“What?”

Liam’s lays a kiss to the center of Zayn’s chest (and Zayn swears that he’s going to ink that there forever so Liam’s lips will always be there - so  _Liam_  will always be there), “Jaan,” he mutters back simply and Zayn feels tears prick the corners of his eyes again, gripping his heart, and he cages Liam in his arms.

And he swears he’s never known a love quite like this.

**Author's Note:**

> Um so that was my first shot at any kind of smut. I didn’t set out to make it that fluffy but Zayn and Liam have a mind of their own and I just - I wanted to write some fluff and it’s all cute and not really all that smutty. Sorry :(
> 
> But I hope you enjoyed it all the same (even though reading it over really shows off how shitty it is.)
> 
> AND VERY SPECIAL THANKS TO NOEL WHO PUT UP WITH ME WRITING THIS AND FREAKING OUT ABOUT THE WEIRDEST, MOST AWAKWARD THINGS. THIS WOULDN’T BE HERE WITHOUT HER :DDDDDDDDDD


End file.
